


Plucking the Stars from the Sky

by astromirage



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Basically tsukki finally cracks when he messes up a block during practice scrimmage, M/M, Self Confidence Issues, Tsukishima Kei Needs a Hug, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, give my baby boy something pwease, he has that inferiority complex shown, he sees yamaguchi trying so hard and kags and shou too and he cant take it, ooc kei tsukishima but thats okay, tsukki cries a lot, yo kei needs emotional help
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:42:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23290399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astromirage/pseuds/astromirage
Summary: twitter:kakyoinsplash
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Kudos: 112





	Plucking the Stars from the Sky

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

Tsukishima Kei has walls. Barriers he set up so he didn’t have to go through what he did with his older brother again. The only person he let in through even one of those walls is Yamaguchi Tadashi. And he still hides so much from him, trying not to look vulnerable and soft. Tadashi is his boyfriend, yet he feels an urge to hide so much from him.

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

Tsukishima watches the freak duo work together, perfectly in synch, smiling when they land a perfect play. He feels his stomach churn and bile burn at his throat. Instead of making a reaction he takes a gulp of water and practices his overhand serves against a wall, everyone occupied with someone a lot more important than him. He catches a serve that bounces a bit too high, he turns his attention to Yamaguchi serving to Nishinoya. He sets up his float serve and executes it, perfectly. It drops off right before Noya’s eyes before he can get to it. The team looks on in amazement, Tadashi immediately turns to his boyfriend. His eyes are lit up and his smile is so bright it’s blinding. Tsukishima smiles and gives him a thumbs up. 

Nausea builds up in his stomach again. He feels the world looking down on him. Just an average middle blocker. Just someone who had too many walls, too many barriers, that no one wanted to break through. He feels his stomach bubble and twist, he slaps a hand over his mouth and clutches his stomach. 

He looks over to Kageyama, Hinata, and Yamaguchi, talking amongst themselves and setting up to do some drills. He turns away, Tadashi is trying so hard and he’s doing so well, Hinata and Kageyama, there’s not much to be said about their skill, it’s out of Tsukishima’s reach or capability. 

He walks outside for a bit, trying to regain control of himself and trying not to throw up. 

‘Stop it, stop it, stopitstopitstopitstopitstopitstopit.’ he can’t breathe. He looks at the moon and feels the grass under his feet, feels the cold air nip at his skin. He feels himself calm down and heads back inside just on time for the scrimmage match. 

They split up and start the match. Tsukki can’t help the inferiority that’s gnawing at the back of his head. Telling him that he’ll never be good enough, that he will never be seen next to the freak duo, that he is nothing, nothing at all, unimportant to this team. Reminding him that he is nothing but replaceable. 

He jumps to block a ball and it makes its way through, he grimaces and ignores his teammates chanting all right. It is not all right, just take me off the team, he thinks. 

The entire game goes like that he fucks up every block he tries to stop. His form by the end of the game is loose and wild. His blocks are even worse and his teammates look at him like he’s going insane. 

His team loses and he sighs. The part of his brain is telling him he was right about everything.

Before his team could say anything he rushes out of the gym, he can feel everyone’s eyes glued onto him, shaming him for his inferiority. Tadashi rushes after him. 

Tadashi knows that his boyfriend has issues. He’s foul-mouthed and hard-headed, but it’s not only that. He knows for a fact that Kei can’t think of himself as anything more than an average guy, he knows he can’t help but compare himself to everyone around him. He knows that he has a lot more walls to break through with his boyfriend. But he also knows Tsukki thinks he has kept Tadashi out and kept himself safe, safe from pain and safe from anything anyone could do. Tadashi knows for a fact, he may have built these walls to keep himself safe from the outside, but he never thought about how to protect himself from himself. 

Tadashi runs up a hill to see his boyfriend staring up at the moon. He sits next to him, leaning on him. 

“Did you know that Coach Ukai said he was proud of you?” Tadashi whispers. 

Tsukishima looks at him. “Really?” 

“Yea, while I was bench-warming he mutters to himself about your progress and how he’s proud.”

He hums in response. 

“If Coach Ukai can see it, and I can see it, why can’t you Kei?”

“What?”

“I asked you, why you can’t see that you’re great and talented and amazing?” 

He moves away from him. Tsukishima’s eyes water and he buries his head in his hands. 

“Because I’m awful. I suck so much. You guys are doing so well and I, I am just standing here as all of you jump higher and higher.” 

“Then jump with us Kei!” 

“I can’t!” he cries out. “I’m so scared. I’m scared because I know that the higher I jump, the farther I have to fall!”

“You can’t be scared of something just because you might fail!”

“It’s not just that, but,” he sniffles and wipes never-ending tears. “I’m so scared of not meeting expectations.”

“You’re doing that right now Kei! You’re telling yourself you can’t so you’re not! You’re not meeting expectations because you won’t rise to them!”

Kei looks up at his as he stands up, trying to throw together something. Kei feels tears run down his face so he wipes them away, but they’re replaced quickly. 

“I know you think you’re safeguarding yourself, but you’re not! You’re just downplaying your talent!” 

“You’re so talented and skilled Kei Tsukishima,” he kneels, “I know that your brain won’t let you believe that, but you are. And I know you think it’s better if you keep me out and you build those walls up. But I’m going to let you in on a little secret.”

Kei looks at him, confused. Tadashi swipes away at the tears still cascading down his boyfriend’s face. “I love you Tsukki. I love you so much, and I don’t care if it takes me years to help you tear down those walls, I am going to help. I promise.” 

Tadashi smiles and ruffles his hair. “Do you wanna train with me after school?” 

Kei nods and smiles before making moves to get up. Yamaguchi pulls him up and into his arms, promise we’re gonna do this together?” 

Tsukishima nods and they look at each other, lovingly and softly. Tadashi kisses Kei, sweet and affectionately. 

“I love you too,” Kei mutters under his breath.

**Author's Note:**

> twitter:kakyoinsplash


End file.
